The information was so rich that we decided that next week, we will all pick a section that we like and share on it.
Going forward, we will not read necessarily read a whole chapter each week but pause at each subchapter and open the group up for sharing before continuing with the rest of the chapter.
1/20/2019 #109. This week we read and discussed the book You Can’t Make Me Angry (YCMMA) by Dr. Paul O. up to 74:Responding. We discussed communication: different levels of communication and negative ways of reacting when emotionally triggered by another person.
2/3/2019 #111. This week we read and discussed the book You Can’t Make Me Angry (YCMMA) by Dr. Paul O. up to 80:0. We discussed more basic communication techniques: responding, validation, active listening, feedback by paraphrasing, the role of silence and the formula:
I feel ____________ (state your feelings, not your thoughts.)
When you do _____________ (don’t be judgemental or sarcastic.)
In such and such a situation ____________ (give a precise time and place.)
We also read the handout recommended from last week on Taking Suggestions by Jeremy B.
Next week, we will continue with the book.
Notes from the author: Nothing is more destructive to living a life of emotional independence that being a victim of one’s resentments.
When we play the role of victim, we do not have to take responsibility for our feelings and we spiritually chain ourselves to the person we feel victimized by.
My favorite quote: “My life is my responsibility. The circumstances of my life do not determine the quality of my life; the quality of my life is determined by my reaction to circumstances.” (87-1)
Acceptance is ultimately the answer. My emotions do not have to be dependent on others.
What is the goal? Is the goal to get the other to admit they are wrong and you are right? Or, is your goal simply to feel better?
Pray and ask for guidance, and be clear about your motive and leave the results up to God.
Live the program, not the problem.
Is it important? Is there anything I can do about it? Is it any of my business?
3/10/2019 #116. This week, we completed our discussion on the book You Can’t Make Me Angry (YCMMA) by Dr. Paul O. up to 148-0. The topic was “Love and service” and that the primary emotions that drive us are “love” or “fear.”
Next week we will begin Step 12.
If there is interest, I would also like to include The Little Red Book.
We will read only from 1 book at a time, and when we complete one section, we will read from the stories in the AA Big Book before moving onto the next source of literature.
So far, everyone seemed to really enjoy You Can’t Make Me Angry (YCMMA) by Dr. Paul O. and 1 person requested that we read it again as a group.
Next week we will begin our study of Step 12. We will start with reading out of the AA Big Book.
Here is the link to the page on the blog of the various documents on Step 12.